Finding Mary (Part 1)

07 DEC 2016

Prague, CZ

PART 1: Whatever Became of The Person I Never Was?

Dear Mathos,

We all knew this day was coming; yesterday Mary committed suicide.

Regards,

Kyle

Like Jan, Kyle had always been conservative with words and the eleven-word email notification of Mary’s death was fairly reflective of his tendency toward brevity. He had known Kyle for a very long time and with each year that had passed since that night, Kyle seemed to speak less and less. It was as if a heavy dark curtain was being slowly lowered between Kyle’s mind and the rest of the world. In many ways, Kyle had handled things better than the rest of them, although, that was faint praise at best.

Despite the email being short and to the point, Mathos had nonetheless decided to print it out. The message, while terse, was so deeply disturbing that even the printer had failed on its first attempt to materialize the contents, however, the contents needed the reality of paper. After a long press of the reset button, the printer reluctantly printed the message, but not without an uncharacteristically large number of clunks, clanks, pauses, and hesitations. Perhaps it was just an ink-jet printer doing what ink-jet printers do, or perhaps it was something more. Mathos withdrew the note from the printer tray, folded it, and headed for the train station.

He and the station had a long, if somewhat turbulent and painful history. He had often gone there to reflect on the unpleasant events of his life. Today the unpleasant event would be the life and death of Mary, as well as his relationship with her. Today, these events would occupy his thoughts and be the object of his tormented memories. Mary had been the first, but only the first, of many women he had called Mary. Thinking of her would take him back more than three decades to a time, a place, and an event that had forever changed his life and ultimately destroyed hers. Mary wasn’t the first, nor would she be the last of those who would have to die twice for what happened that moonless night in the Chihuahuan desert, just a few miles south of the Texas border.